Assertiveness in leadership falls into the ‘Self Expression’ scale of emotional intelligence designed by psychologist, Dr. Reuven Bar-on and relates to the ability to communicate with clarity, confidence, and conviction while maintaining a respectful and inclusive environment. Leaders strong in balancing their assertiveness may have the confidence to express ideas, set expectations, make decisions, and address conflicts in a manner that promotes collaboration, fosters trust, and drives positive outcomes.

While some leaders are skilled in the art of striking a balance when it comes to assertiveness, others find it a bit more challenging. The opposite of an assertive leader is a passive one. Passive leaders tend to avoid confrontation, shy away from making decisions, and prioritise maintaining harmony and the status quo over achieving goals. They often struggle with making themselves visible which can sometimes lead to a lack of direction and motivation within their teams.

I bet you’re now thinking of someone you’ve been led by who is either too assertive or too passive.

Assertiveness is about finding the balance to stand up for yourself and maintain the courage of your convections, while being empathic, respectful and, kind towards those your lead. And it pays off.

Here’s why empathic assertiveness will benefit you and your organisation:

Assertive leaders are skilled communicators who can convey expectations, interactions and feedback effectively. By expressing their thoughts clearly, they effectively minimise misunderstandings and create cohesive work environments.

Assertive leaders are able to make firm decisions, free from bias or emotion, weighing different perspectives and taking calculated risks to solve problems. They provide clear direction to their teams and inspire confidence through their decisive actions.

Those skilled in the art of assertiveness are able to resolve conflicts in a constructive manner. By openly discussing disagreements and seeking mutually beneficial solutions, these leaders foster a culture of collaboration and trust.

Assertive leaders empower their team members by encouraging them to express their ideas and opinions. They create an environment where everyone feels heard and valued, resulting in increased engagement and productivity.

Here’s why empathic assertiveness will benefit you and your organisation:

So, how can you hone your assertiveness?

It starts with listening. Effective leaders balance assertiveness with active listening. By genuinely listening to others’ perspectives, leaders demonstrate empathy and respect. When you’re listening to others, you’re naturally able to pick up on the impact of what you’re saying too.

Empathic leaders skilled in striking the assertiveness balance don’t impose directions or instructions on people, they involve others in the decision making process. By seeking input, considering diverse viewpoints, and facilitating open discussions, they promote a sense of ownership and collective responsibility.

This leads to constructive feedback. Leaders well versed in assertiveness can provide feedback in a supportive manner, focusing on specific behaviours and outcomes rather than attacking individuals. They aim to encourage growth and improvement while maintaining a supportive and respectful environment.

Assertive leaders are open to new ideas, feedback, and different approaches, adjusting their plans as necessary. Flexibility, again, helps builds trust and encourages collaboration.

Here are a few tips and tricks to help you build your leadership assertiveness in the workplace:

• Know your worth: Recognise your value and the contributions you bring to the table. Build confidence in your abilities, skills, and knowledge, which will serve as a foundation for assertiveness.
• Practice self-awareness: Reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours in different work situations. Identify areas where you tend to be passive or hesitant, and consciously work on changing those patterns.
• Improve your communication skills: Develop clear and concise communication techniques. Practice expressing your ideas, opinions, and expectations in a confident and respectful manner. Pay attention to your tone, body language, and the words you choose.
• Set boundaries: Clearly define your limits and communicate them to others. Be assertive in saying “no” when necessary and in asserting your needs. Respect your time and workload by learning to delegate and prioritise effectively.
• Active listening: Pay attention to what others are saying and make an effort to understand their perspectives. Actively listen without interrupting, and ask clarifying questions to demonstrate your engagement. This will help build rapport and create a collaborative environment.
• Seek feedback: Request feedback from colleagues or supervisors to gain insights into areas where you can improve your assertiveness. Embrace constructive criticism and work on incorporating the suggestions provided.
• Practice assertive body language: Stand tall, maintain eye contact, and use confident gestures. Projecting a positive and assertive physical presence can enhance your self-assurance and how others perceive you.
• Start small and build momentum: Begin by asserting yourself in smaller, less intimidating situations. Gradually challenge yourself to be more assertive in larger and more significant scenarios. Celebrate your successes along the way to boost your confidence.
• Manage conflict constructively: Address conflicts promptly and directly, focusing on the issues at hand rather than personal attacks. Use “I” statements to express your feelings and thoughts, and actively seek solutions that are mutually beneficial.
• Seek professional development: Consider attending workshops, seminars, or training programs on assertiveness, communication, and leadership skills. Investing in your personal growth and development will enhance your assertive abilities.

Ultimately, when striking the right balance between assertiveness and empathy, leaders inspire and motivate their teams while fostering collaboration and trust. By embracing assertiveness as a key leadership trait, individuals can unlock their full potential and guide their teams towards excellence.

If assertiveness is an area that you believe needs developing, why not learn more about our emotional intelligence coaching. We use the EQ-i 2.0, the world’s only scientifically validated tool for the measurement of emotional intelligence, to identify areas for development and work with our clients to help them achieve their goals.

The post Asserting Your Mojo: 5 Benefits Of Assertiveness in Leadership. appeared first on ThinkEQ.

Merron comes up with three key stages that he believes are crucial in creating effective cultures led from the top:

What is a workplace culture?

A workplace culture defines the values, beliefs, and behaviors that shape the environment in which employees operate. It has a profound impact on employee satisfaction, engagement, productivity, and overall organisational success. While culture is influenced by various factors, its transformation begins with the leadership at the top. In this blog post, we will explore why changing the workplace culture starts at the top and how leaders can spearhead this transformative process.

At Think EQ, this is our approach to creating cultures that put people at the heart:

1. Setting the Tone

Right at the top, your leaders are the flag bearers of organisational values. They have the power to set the tone for the entire workforce. When leaders demonstrate a commitment to fostering a positive and inclusive culture, employees take notice and are more likely to emulate those behaviors. By modeling the desired cultural attributes, such as transparency, respect, and collaboration, leaders send a powerful message that reverberates throughout the organisation.

2. Defining the Vision

The leadership play a pivotal role in defining the vision and mission of an organisation. By clearly articulating these guiding principles, leaders provide a roadmap for employees to align their actions and behaviors. When the workplace culture is a top priority, leaders should incorporate cultural aspirations into the organisation’s vision statement, reinforcing the importance of cultivating a positive and thriving work environment.

3. Aligning Policies and Practices

To effect cultural change, leaders must align policies and practices with the desired cultural attributes. This includes revisiting and reevaluating existing policies, procedures, and systems to ensure they support the intended culture. For instance, leaders can promote flexible work arrangements to emphasise trust and work-life balance, or establish transparent communication channels to foster openness and collaboration. By addressing structural and operational aspects of the organisation, leaders lay the foundation for a culture that nurtures employee well-being and success.

4. Empowering and Developing Employees

Leadership plays a critical role in empowering and developing employees. By providing opportunities for growth, recognising achievements, and fostering a learning culture, leaders promote engagement and satisfaction among the workforce. Those at the top should actively support initiatives that encourage skill development, mentorship programs, and regular feedback. When employees feel valued and supported, they are more likely to contribute their best efforts towards achieving organisational goals.

5. Accountability and Transparency

An organisation’s leaders must hold themselves and others accountable for upholding the desired culture. This involves consistent communication of expectations, providing feedback, and addressing behaviour misalignments promptly. Bosses should lead by example and demonstrate integrity and transparency in their actions. By creating a culture of accountability, leaders foster an environment where individuals take ownership of their responsibilities and actions.

6. Encouraging Diversity and Inclusion

An inclusive workplace culture embraces diversity and values the unique perspectives and experiences that each individual brings. Those in charge should champion diversity and inclusion initiatives, actively seeking diverse talent, and promoting equal opportunities for all employees. By fostering an environment where differences are celebrated, leaders can create a culture that is both innovative and adaptable.

7. Continuous Evaluation and Adaptation

Culture is not static; it evolves over time. Effective leaders understand the importance of continuous evaluation and adaptation to ensure the workplace culture remains aligned with the organisation’s goals and values. Regular feedback mechanisms, surveys, and open forums can help leaders gauge the pulse of the organisation and identify areas for improvement. By being responsive to employee feedback and adapting strategies accordingly, leaders demonstrate their commitment to fostering a positive workplace culture.

So who’s responsible for driving the culture?

Changing workplace culture is a complex and multifaceted endeavor. However, it is the responsibility of leaders to drive this transformation. By setting the tone, defining the vision, aligning policies, empowering employees, and encouraging accountability, leaders can create an environment where employees feel valued, motivated, and engaged. Changing the workplace culture starts at the top, and when leaders prioritise this effort, the positive effects ripple throughout the entire organisation, resulting in improved employee well-being, productivity, and organisational success.

Which companies have got it right? Which companies have still got some way to go? This article has some great examples that have undergone a cultural u-turn.

The post How Changing The Workplace Culture Starts At The Top appeared first on ThinkEQ.

Creating a coaching culture within an organisation involves fostering an environment that promotes learning, growth, and development through coaching principles and practices. We have been fortunate enough to work with some top organisations focused on growing their businesses through the development of their people. They have had one thing in common – a desire to create a coaching culture within. In this blog, we will outline the key steps we have taken to help organisations create coaching cultures that drive performance.

Steps to a Coaching Culture:

Define the Vision:

Start by clearly articulating the vision and goals of the coaching culture. Outline how coaching will contribute to individual and organisational success. This vision should align with the overall mission and values of the organisation.

Train and Develop Leaders:

Provide training and development opportunities to leaders and managers to become effective coaches. Equip them with the necessary skills, such as active listening, powerful questioning, providing feedback, and supporting employee growth. Help leaders understand the benefits of coaching and how it aligns with their roles and responsibilities.

Communicate and Educate:

Create awareness and communicate the importance of coaching to all employees. Share success stories, case studies, and research findings that highlight the positive impact of coaching on individual and team performance. Conduct workshops or seminars to educate employees about coaching principles and techniques.

Foster a Learning Mindset:

Cultivate a culture of continuous learning and growth. Encourage employees to seek feedback, embrace challenges, and view failures as learning opportunities. Recognise and reward efforts that demonstrate a commitment to personal and professional development.

Integrate Coaching into Performance Management:

Incorporate coaching elements into the performance management process. Encourage regular coaching conversations between managers and employees to set goals, provide feedback, and discuss progress. Encourage the use of coaching techniques, such as goal-setting, action planning, and performance reviews.

Provide Coaching Resources:

Ensure that coaches and employees have access to resources that support coaching initiatives. This may include coaching guides, toolkits, online courses, or external coaching services. Provide ongoing support and development opportunities for coaches to enhance their skills and stay up to date with best practices. Our coach training is Association for Coaching accredited and we offer a variety of resources and CPD opportunities to our coaches.

Encourage Peer Coaching and Mentoring:

Promote a culture of peer coaching and mentoring, where employees support and learn from each other. Encourage individuals to share their expertise, provide guidance, and offer constructive feedback to their colleagues.

Measure and Evaluate:

Establish metrics and evaluation mechanisms to assess the impact of coaching efforts. Collect feedback from employees and managers to gauge the effectiveness of coaching initiatives and identify areas for improvement. Use this data to refine and enhance the coaching culture and as a result, the organisations we’ve worked with have seen growth and profitability increased. You can learn more about how we’ve measured coaching by reading our case studies.

Lead by Example:

Leaders and managers should embody coaching principles and serve as role models. Demonstrate active listening, empathy, and a genuine commitment to employee development. Encourage open and honest communication and create a safe space for employees to seek guidance and support.

How this Works:

Remember, creating a coaching culture is an ongoing process that requires commitment and consistency. It takes time to embed coaching practices into the fabric of the organisation, but the rewards in terms of employee engagement, growth, and organisational success are worth the effort.

The post Creating A Coaching Culture To Drive High Performance appeared first on ThinkEQ.

Self-awareness is the true gift for successful leaders:

In a leadership sense, self-awareness is a true gift because those who have this as a strength have a great sense of ‘self’. They know their emotional triggers and how, all woven together with learned behaviours and attitude, they make a leader who can empathise, make good decisions, be objective, see the ‘bigger picture’, and has a more rounded sense of their own wellbeing and that of others, principally of those they lead.

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Maya Angelou

American civil rights activist and poet, Maya Angelou, expressed it best when she famously said that people will never forget how you made them feel. This, as a leader, is what you should always be striving for – treating people with respect and making them feel valued. To do this with authenticity, leaders need to be tuned into themselves and hone their self-awareness.

Think of a leader you’ve worked with who has had a lasting impact on you. Whether it’s because they’ve been great or terrible, their self-awareness has probably had something to do with it.

What are the traits of a self-aware leader?

A self-aware leader will:

• Sincerely value people and their contributions
• Listen actively and intently and not assume that their way is the only/best way
• Communicate with clarity, kindness and collaboration
• Value feedback as a tool to learn and develop
• Invest time in those around them to understand their goals and ambitions
• Will their team to succeed by lifting them up and not putting them down

Revisiting your strengths:

Your strengths change over time and in different situations and contexts. That’s why it’s important to revisit them to see if they are still active. You should aim to revisit your strengths every six months or so. Professional coaching can really help with this, particularly if your coach is trained to use an emotional intelligence or Strengths Profile diagnostic tool to help you work on your strengths (realised and unrealised), learned behaviours and weaknesses. A professional coach will help you to identify these and come up with smart ways to develop them. Have you acquired any new strengths that help to support your self-awareness and be a great leader? Are you still aware of how your words, actions, behaviours and attitudes impact on those you’re leading?

Get ahead of the game: developing the leaders of the future to be self-aware:

Coaching for managers is one way to develop authentic self-aware leaders before the need to lead really emerges. Managers are the glue that sticks the organisation together, focusing on the operational or task management, while delivering to the strategic objectives. In developing your managers’ self-awareness early, you will equip them with the right skills to motivate the workforce and bring teams on board with decisions. This leads to high functioning, high performance workplaces where staff retention is high.

Ultimately, if self-awareness is not a strength that comes easily to you, don’t worry about it as this is a strength that can be developed with the right development action plan in place. Speak to use to see how we use the Strengths Profile to build and develop high performing workplaces.

To see how we made self-awareness the key to successful leadership with one of the UK’s leading cancer charities, read our case study.

The post Why self-awareness is the key to successful leadership. appeared first on ThinkEQ.

In her acceptance speech on November 19 2014, Nicola Sturgeon opened up with a pledge to the people of Scotland, “I will be the first minister for all of Scotland, regardless of your politics or point of view. My job is to serve you and I promise to do this to the very best of my ability”. Since that date, Sturgeon has gone on to be the longest serving first minister of Scotland. 

However, for every supporter that Nicola Sturgeon has, there’s a critic. Indeed, during her resignation speech in Bute House, she pointed out to journalists “I am a human being as well as a politician”, suggesting that with her role put to one side, she has feelings and emotions like any other person. 

“Giving absolutely everything of yourself to this job is the only way to do it. The country deserves nothing less. But in truth that can only be done by anyone for so long. For me, it is now in danger of becoming too long.” 

Nicola Sturgeon

Jacinda Adern became prime minister at the age of 36 in the 2017 General Election, the youngest in New Zealand since 1856. Adern was a ground breaker in politics. The second female world leader to give birth while in office, she went on to make headlines across the globe when she brought her daughter, Neve, to the floor in the United Nations General Assembly in New York City.  In doing so, she was quoted as saying that “being more open might create a path for other women”.

During the global coronavirus pandemic, both Adern and Sturgeon were commended for their warm and empathic emotional expression, their openness, vulnerability and clear decision making, in stark contrast to other world leaders, principally Donald Trump and Boris Johnson. 

Since then, popularity has dwindled for both Sturgeon and Adern. According to Firstpost, “Ardern’s popularity has since waned as she battled declining trust in government, a deteriorating economic situation, and a resurgent conservative Opposition”. 

In her resignation speech, Jacinda Adern commented, “I’m leaving, because with such a privileged role comes responsibility – the responsibility to know when you are the right person to lead and also when you are not. I know what this job takes. And I know that I no longer have enough in the tank to do it justice. It’s that simple,”. She further went on to say, “I am human, politicians are human. We give all that we can for as long as we can. And then it’s time. And for me, it’s time,” 

“I hope I leave New Zealanders with a belief that you can be kind, but strong, empathetic but decisive, optimistic but focused. And that you can be your own kind of leader – one who knows when it’s time to go,” 

Jacinda Adern

Four weeks later, Sturgeon took to the podium to deliver her resignation speech explaining that she was “drained by the unrelenting and unforgiving pressures of modern politics…with a 24-hour news cycle, the intensity of social media and modern politics’ focus on personality”. 

Ultimately, both Adern and Sturgeon indicated that, for reasons mentioned above, they were no longer the best person for the job because they were unable to give it the commitment, attention and energy required to do it well. People forgetting that they are human, ‘not having enough in the tank’, and a feeling that the role would be better served by someone who would give it 100% were common features of both speeches. 

If you’re in a leadership role and wondering if it’s time to refocus and move on, here are some things to consider:

• Are you still motivated to do the role?
• Do you still find personal enrichment from the work you’re doing?
• Is your work environment harmonious and high performing, or is it toxic and unhappy? 
• Are you experiencing burn out?
• Do you feel psychologically safe to speak out?
• Are you using your skills and strengths every day?
• Do you feel inspired to lead and to help others to grow?
• Do your organisation’s values reflect your own?

Leadership is a tough gig. Motivating yourself and others is tough. Making (sometimes) unpopular decisions is tough.

Knowing when the right time to move on is also tough and a real skill.

#internationalwomensday2023.

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At that time, the women who inspired me the most were those in the news for their charitable work, the obvious one being Princess Diana. Her empathy and kindness towards those in need and suffering was quite remarkable. I loved Diana’s sheer disregard for the norm, showing us that it’s ok to cry and that despite who you are or what you’ve got, your humility, humanity and self-respect says everything about you.

When we think about inspirational women, it’s normal to let our minds wander to the most famous and celebrated women we’ve heard of – and for very good reasons. Michelle Obama for her promotion of women’s rights, Rosa Parks for her bravery and courage in challenging racial prejudice and Mother Teresa for her humanitarian work. Indeed, the more recognisable and ‘global’ the woman, the more our perception of them is clouded, elevating them to an almost saintly pedestal.

​There are achievements and successes to be found locally though. We don’t even need to leave our houses, switch the tv on or use google. I want to talk about a couple of everyday women who inspire me now. No royal titles, no political leaders, no multimillionaires. And that’s the beauty of celebrating our sisters. Regardless of where you are in life, there’s a celebration of success to be found in all pockets of our communities.

​Shelley Kerr

Shelley is one of Scotland’s most decorated and successful professional footballers. Currently the manager of the Scotland National Team, Shelley led her Arsenal team to win the FA Cup. At Hibernian (my local team!), Shelley captained the team to win the Scottish Cup twice – stats the men’s team can only dream of! For me, Shelley is a true leader and motivator and doesn’t get a fraction of the airtime that she truly deserves.

​Lisa Fleming

Lisa is a former parent from my other business, Rugbytots and working with her led to a collaboration of other child play activities. Roll on a few years and I was heartbroken to learn that she had been diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer, with no primary diagnosis given. In 2018, Lisa discovered that the cancer had spread to her brain.

Now, while many of us would experience a whole range of emotions and probably shut the whole world out, Lisa started her own charity, Make 2nds Count. She discovered that of all the funding for breast cancer research, only 5-9% goes towards researching secondary cancer.

Around 1000 people a month in the UK die of secondary cancer – staggering. Funds raised for Make 2nds Count will go directly to secondary breast cancer research in the form of The Secondary Breast Cancer Team based at the MRC Institute of Genetics and Molecular Medicine at the University of Edinburgh.

To me, Lisa is the absolute definition of bravery and courage. Selfless and completely resolute in her desire to understand secondary cancer so that the lives of others can be improved and increased. This lady is a true hero.

In our next blog, we will be reviewing our, all female leadership ‘The Daring Way™’ workshop, based on the research of the amazing Dr. Brené Brown. This workshop is now fully booked but look out for details of our next event.

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As many people will know, my husband is a proud New Zealander, and my family and I have an incredibly strong love for the country; its landscape, it’s culture, but most importantly – the people. That’s why on the 15th March, when I heard of a mass terrorist shooting having taken place in two mosques in Christchurch, my heart absolutely broke for them. This is not New Zealand.

My first thought ran to the poor families. Nobody expects their families to go to pray and not come back. What a loss.

If I felt it profoundly some eleven thousand miles away, I could only imagine the sheer numbness, shock and grief our families were experiencing over there.

What was required was intervention. A real leader who could empathise with those also in shock because she, too, was in shock. Arose Jacinda Ardern, prime minister of New Zealand, whose emotional expression showed her courage and vulnerability to her people. She showed that she understood the grief because she felt it too. Quickly praised for her response to the situation, what really inspired me from afar, was her ability to take control of the situation as a vulnerable woman, not a scripted and robotic politician.

We talk often of ‘emotional expression’ in emotional intelligence. Simply put, emotional expression includes both facial expressions and body movements that accompany the internal experience of emotion and that clearly serve to communicate that emotion to others. Influenced by the work of Charles Darwin, psychologists have long regarded the communication of emotion as an important function with survival value for the species

Dr Brene Brown talks of the ‘authentic self’ which is absolutely key in building trust with those around you.

Jacinda didn’t need to talk of deploying military style tactics to keep the country safe, she didn’t talk of building walls to keep people out. She didn’t talk of hate. She bit back when Donald Trump talked of ‘sending assistance’. New Zealand needed love. It didn’t need money thrown at it.

Instead, her message was one of solidarity and she was utterly authentic in her emotion. Focused entirely on the victims, the plight of their families and of the need to take immediate action to prevent such a tragedy from ever occurring again. Robust, natural, empathetic leadership.

A few things really stood out for me in her response:

• Emotional expression in her first tv interview. Her reaction is one of visible shock and anguish. Very relatable, provoking sympathy for the victims and a feeling of true understanding.
• She assumed accountability and took on the problem personally as though she was dealing with a personal tragedy.
• Engaged with the victims and their families. Showed an authentic understanding and compassion for their cultural and religious beliefs.
• Response was not autocratic, hateful or militant rather, awe inspiring love for the families and for the country.
• Tactful but resourceful; calling on all parties to get back to parliament immediately to change the law.

​It must be incredibly difficult to lead when you are not able to connect or relate to a situation emotionally. Take BP for example. In the EQ Edge book, there’s an example of a spokesman for the BP CEO responding to an oil spill incident where eleven people died. Of course, the CEO took full responsibility for the tragedy, but his actions simply did not match his words. He talked of ‘little mistakes’, he shouted at a camera man and responded by saying “I’d like my life back”. Can you imagine the leader of a nation responding to a mass shooting in this manner? True, this is likely to have been the CEO’s ‘authentic self’, but probably not a leader people would respect.

On the opposite site of that, there is the example of the CEO of Johnston and Johnston and his reaction to the 1982 Tylenol poisoning tragedy, resulting in seven deaths. In his tv interview, he was visibly upset. It had clearly affected him emotionally. His message, and the delivery of it, were entirely authentic. He took personal responsibility and swift action to ensure that a similar incident wouldn’t ever occur again. The public could see that he was a good guy.

Lead from the heart. Show people that you’re human. Show them that you have emotions. Being a trusted leader means showing people your vulnerabilities, however uncomfortable. It is a strength to have the courage to show your vulnerabilities, not a weakness. Good leaders wear enough of their hearts on their sleeves to strike a good balance of emotion with confidence to inspire real and meaningful action.

As Dr Brown would say, “be honest and let ourselves be seen. Let ourselves be vulnerably seen”. ​

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